However there are a couple scientists here that CRACK ME UP! One of them is a stereotypical, middle aged, Indian guy with a thick accent, fat rimmed glasses and funky 70's style clothing he must have bought when JCPenny's was still in business. The guy literally wears a pocket protector.
He assumes I watch MTV and things of the sort because he asks me if I see "The Situation" do this or that, or if I saw (insert title of TV show here) which of course I don't. I guess he thinks since I am the young guy in the office I must watch this shit. He rambles on excitedly in his thick ass accent, filling me in on the guy who "skipped the massage and went straight for the gential area". Don't ask. I hardly figured out what the hell he was talking about but it involved a handjob I think. Then he tells me for the 32nd time about Lady fucking Gaga and what the song "Alejandro" is REALLY about.
I asked him if he would start calling ME the situation, and he responded "you are no situation, my friend"
Its actually sort of become the highlight of my day. I want to follow this guy home and simply watch HIM for entertainment. He seems to get most of his cues concerning American pop culture through adolescent television programing and radio which clearly paints us out to be pill popping, overtanned, Ed Hardy wearing fuckos. Give him another year, and I think he will be sporting a fo-hawk.
Today's news is relatively entertaining. In regards to Prop 8., the opposition has set forth a new argument supporting the ban on gay marriages:
"The record leaves no doubt, none at all, that California, 44 other states, and the vast majority of countries throughout the world continue to draw the line at marriage because it continues to serve a vital societal interest that is equally ubiquitous – to channel potentially procreative sexual relationships into enduring, stable unions for the sake of responsibly producing and raising the next generation,"
Are they trying to say we won't breed enough if we allow gays to get married?! Seriously?! People are already popping out too many kids as it is!
I dont think this argument is even worth dignifying with a response. Its just plain stupidity.
On a lighter note, Paul Rubens a.k.a Pee Wee Herman recently "proved" he wasn't jacking off in a theatre back in the day because as the police report said, he was jacking off with his left hand. Pee Wee says he is right handed and most people jerk off using their dominant hand. Ever heard of a "STRANGER" Pee Wee?! I thought most people were switch hitters, anyways? I dont think Pee Wee would do very well in law school.
I guess guys are into this chick, but I would only fuck her if she let me put my foot on her face while doing so.
I saw this pic and couldn't help but post it. While quite funny, I also feel bad for this kid- he's going to cough his little lungs out! That bong is WAY too big for a kid his size!
In sporting news, the English Premier League started this weekend, so on Sundays you will most likely find me hammered and yelling at the TV. I think I may even bust out an adult diaper so I don't have to leave the couch.
These fucking English people are nuts about their football. I gotta make my way to England one of these days just to join them in rioting ove a fucking game of soccer. I'll be in the news for getting my ass kicked, I just know it. Until then it's just the couch,my favorite glass friend and I. You have been warned.
In "basketball news", Lebron James is so big a headline read "Lebron's new teammate arrested" Poor guy. Not only does he get arrested, but he doesnt even have a name, he is soley "Lebron's teammate". Nevermind the dude was on the team before Lebron.
Oh and the A's got beat by the Twins again. C'mon guys, you're starting to fall apart!
On a personal note, I asked this woman out via Facebook the other day which is totally NOT my style, nor should it be anyone's. This girl is fucking hilarious so I figured I would probably get made fun of, but she was pretty cool in her rejection. It turns out she has a boyfriend (figures) and as I suspected, I am not the only dumb ass to make such a move.
I don't know what it is with women lately. The ones I am attracted to put me in the friend zone very quickly and those that are attracted to me I have no interest in. I think the bay area has been cruel to me in this respect. While my style or lack thereof, may look a bit conservative sometimes, my taste in women is anything but. Women here in the bay are so much more attractive given their personal style than they are in place like L.A. It seems to me ladies in the bay dress for themselves, and no one else- not each other, guys, magazines, etc. THAT is so much more attractive than the typical fake blonde with fake breasts, asses and tans. I NEED a little imperfection. It reminds me you're human. The term "I need a sense of humor" has become so cliche I don't think most people understand what it even means. I was recently out on a date with a woman who laughed at everything I said, even when I wasnt trying to make her laugh. Needless to say, I havent called her again. Big tits can only hold my attention for so long.
On the other hand, I was at one of my normal coffee spots when I ran into this woman I see all the time. after some conversation I asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime but I didnt mean a date or anything of the sort. She seemed receptive until she just sort of stopped talking to me. Apparently she thought I was trying to get into her pants which I most certaintly was not which ultimately displeased her I guess. Its like we're damned if we do, damned if we dont. If I was trying to get into her pants, I would be labled the guy who just wants pussy but if I dont, I am "wasting her time" as she told a mutual acquaintance.
Oh well.
Am I ever going to find a woman that will happily make fun of me and then let me play with her boobs?
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